“Yeah mister, you’d better spill the beans” said Melody with her own grin.“Now, now, ladies...” I said with hands out in a placating motion,...“You wouldn’t want me to get in bad with ‘The Boss’ would you? All good things come to those who wait. I got us all invited along for a little ride is all, and if I tell you more it will totally spoil the surprise, and you really don’t want that now do you?” Both looked like that was precisely what they wanted, so I said, “Now do you? By the way, wasn’t I. ? The Tping of the cranky man?s yard was baizes; no tonight hewould experience the brat hellions wrath with a bag ofburning doodie on his front porch.? L. Taylor stealthily climbed up on the porchand tip toed carefully with a brat?s facial smile, then just as she squatteddown to place the poop bag in front of the front door pivoting on her foot thewooden porch suddenly gave way and the State Delta Zeta Sorority Coed heard afrightening ?CRACK? and her foot fell through the porch leaving her. I thought I had made her mad. In a little while she stood and went into the house. I stayed outside just in case she needed to cool off. After a few minutes I needed a cold beer so I eased into the kitchen, I could hear the shower running in my wife's bathroom so I went back out and walked to our pool. I was standing on the far side of it when my wife walked out on the deck. She called for me to come to her. As I walked up I noticed she was wearing her tight white spandex shorts and a white. Every fucking washing machine I have ever seen has a pull-out switch to turn it on, and every dryer, the button. Why are they different? Now you're probably thinking, "Cameron, who the fuck cares? It's not that big of a deal." But see, there has to be something going on here, or why the hell would they be different? I think it's a big conspiracy, because that's how cynical bastards like me explain everything that they don't understand. There has to be some super-evil suit-wearing bastards.
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